sleep and stomach aches
I expect you'll be seeing some posts on the heavier side (no pun intended) regarding my upcoming surgery. Monday's start of the pre-op diet has kicked me out of denial and into a bit of panic - though it's not entirely conscious panic, mostly it seems to be manifesting as (1) lack of sleep and (2) a constant, low-grade nervous tummy ache.
While these two things aren't the end of the world, the constant lack-of-sleep exhaustion coupled with feeling a little like I might barf at any turn are constant physical reminders of what is coming soon. There's no question that I'm feeling an intense amount of stress. I think right now, the surgery part scares me more than the life after - though don't get me wrong, that's got my in knots too. But, somehow the gravity of the situation is flourishing in my subconscious... and at the same time, I am a strange place of quiet peacefulness with getting the band.
I know it's the right thing and that I've made a good, carefully thought-out decision. But, I wouldn't mind if the next two weeks could just sail past a little more quickly...