Finally Fifty. 50. That's five-zero.

So, ok, it was bound to happen: The freakin' scale moved! FINALLY. It was frustrating to the point where I just stayed off the scale for a few days. I was exhausted seeing the same thing. But, as I hoped, the post-fill liquid/soft food days functioned as a reset button. Today the scale said a firm 208 - that's a 50-pound total loss! I swear I could've burst into tears on the scale - but instead I just stared and it and felt happy so as not to look like a freak at the gym.

In other related news, I went to two regular-size-people stores and was actually able to buy something! I got an XL Charter Club sweater at Macy's *not* in Women's World and then a very cool XL shirt at J. Jill followed up with the crowning jewel: A Size L sweater, also from J. Jill. Now then, I realize sizes vary, but how goddamn cool is it to have something with an "L" on the tag in my closet? Well, you know the answer. Pretty f*cking cool.

Last, I called the first surgeon's office whom I had started with in June just to see if I weighed more and indeed, I did. In June, I was a burgeoning 262. So, the real good news is that since June I've lost 54 pounds. But I'm keeping my official total/ticker to what I was when I went to my surgeon in August. Still, all good news, no?

p.s. Sorry for my erratic posting - break-up land has been less-than-palatable... I recently learned that one of the stages of grief is depression - somehow I didn't know this. I seem to be well past denial (stage 1), and am now bouncing around between stages 2, 3 & 4 - anger, bargaining and depression, respectively - all while looking forward to stage 5, acceptance. Seems the depression part tends to preclude me from posting. Thanks for all your nice messages reminding me to come back - it helps!