Press the Reset Button, Jennifer.

Ok, I realized something: It is me.

Yep, I realized I was off the wagon, but I don't think I knew how far off the wagon I was...so, I hit the reset button this week and, with the help of my ever-faithful pal ck, I set some goals to help be get back in the game. Here they are, both for support to those of you who may be in the same boat, and for accountability:

1. Get back to 800 - 1200 calories/day.
So I did fitday.com for a few days, thought I was practically starving myself and found that I was indeed at the high end of my range...1200 calories! This is fine, but before, I was eating considerably more, meaning I was likely in a 1500-1800 range; fine for maintenance but I'm not there yet. Obviously.

2. No work out, no go out.
Back to this: No wine, drinks, etc. unless I've exercised, and then, only within my calorie range.

3. Exercise: 9 hours/week.
Six days of 1-hour walks + 3 days of 1-hour workouts at the gym, or a second walk, or whatever. 9 hours each week though, with only 1 day of rest.

4. Take the Meds.
I've been blowing off my thyroid medications which is ludicrous; plus stopped taking all insulin-resistance-related drugs after my surgery. Nice Jenn, self-medicate - great idea!...Sigh. I have an appointment with my Endocrinologist next Tuesday. I'll be back to center then, but have gotten back on the thyroid wagon (all the sudden I'm tired and my skin is dry and my hair is growing slow...and and...)

5. Get the Band Adjusted Properly
I'm too tight. I sort of like it; but dumb! Hello - slippage, etc. are huge risks. So, off to the surgeon later today. Git'er done, girl.

6. Nutritionist Check-In
I'm not eating enough protein. I'm eating soft/liquids, too much of them. Probably drinking too much alcohol too - not in an alcoholic way, just in a calorie sense. No more sweet drinks - they taste too good, are too full of calories and too easy to have another. Martinis...savories. Only.

7. Post to the Blog!
You guys help keep me on my toes; when I'm posting, I'm working. When I'm not...well, I'm not...so, I'm back to posting daily or near-daily until I finish losing, or need another break.

8. Dissect the Emotions
Watch for an 'emo' post soon - I've been pulling the emotions apart, and trying to put myself back together in light of what I'm learning. I'm scared to be skinny - no doubt - but I'm ok to keep working toward it at this point and face the fear. More on this soon, but know it's a component.

9. Buy a Scale
Accountability. If I'm not working out at the gym, I have no sense of how I'm doing. It will help. I'm ordering one this week.

10. Sugar only Twice/Week
I was getting mochas. Eating the free evil chocolate at work. Ordering sweet drinks (lemon drops, margaritas)...I was getting addicted again. So I'm off sugar for 1 week - then, it's allowed 2x/week. Period.

I think that's it. I'll revise if I forgot anything. I feel better, and skinnier already, being back on track. Surgeon today - I'm not expecting to lose since I know I've had loads of liquid calories and travels since my last fill; but hopefully this adjustment will get me where I want to go!